Being joyful in motherhood isn’t dependent upon our circumstances. Joy will consistently elude us if we only choose it when everything is okay.
Motherhood typically begins with much joy and an abundance of hope. It’s only natural in most cases. Sure, there is some trepidation about the future, but it’s usually quieted by the awe of this tiny human nestled in your arms.
As you enter different seasons of sleepless nights, toddler tantrums and potty training, you forget that joy. It’s there, but it’s buried under the duties of many hard moments and sleep deprivation. As they grow into teenagers, it’s a whole other universe. The worry sets in. The independence and difference of values and opinions and the pushback challenge you. You learn there’s a whole other way of parenting and it’s not the same way you’ve been doing it.
How can we stay connected with that joy our journey began with?
We must stay connected to Jesus.
Be Joyful Always
We are encouraged to be joyful always. How is that even possible, right? It starts with a heart of gratitude and contentedness. When we stop reaching for the next thing believing it’s the answer to being happy, we are free to fully live right where we are. It’s a choice and we can choose to allow the Spirit to fill us with joy as we practice gratitude and contentment. Find joy by reading God’s Word. This is one source to being joyful in motherhood.
Be Faithful in Prayer
We are instructed to pray continually. Lord knows when He created a way for us to communicate with Him, how much we would need it. We need Him every second of every day and He has given us the ability and power to talk to Him, ask Him what we need, and seek healing for the broken and brokenhearted.
Be Patient in Affliction
This one is particularly challenging for me because I hate conflict. I just want everyone to be happy in Jesus. I guess I’m a bit of an idealist and it’s taken me years to learn to let go of that. Holding onto ideals can be good because there’s nothing wrong with high standards. However, the only one we can set these ideals for is ourselves. So when the time comes that raising our children isn’t living up to the ideals we have set, we need to pray and be patient. God’s purpose for them is higher. God’s story for them is different.
Give Thanks
We are called to give thanks…in ALL circumstances. Again…it seems impossible. Thankfully we are in a relationship with a God…THE God…of the impossible. It IS possible to thank God during less-than-stellar circumstances. If we lived according to our circumstances, we’d seldom be grateful for what we have. Because our circumstances will almost always fail us.
The demanding of my own will is the singular force that smothers out joy — nothing else. Pride slays thanksgiving…A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he gets as much as he deserves
Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts
Be Hopeful
Our children are God’s before they are ours. He loves them more than we are even capable of. Which is truly comforting. I never thought of myself as a mom who worries but once my children became teens and as they are becoming adults, it’s been really hard to not worry. Don’t be discouraged if your kids do things differently than you did or you would have.
They are finding their own path and this is to be expected. As parents, we want our kids to follow the path of least resistance—or hardship. But they want to make those decisions for themselves and we need to let them. As our kids transition from teens to adults, our job transitions as well. We have every reason to hope that they will come out on the other side stronger and wiser for the challenges they will inevitably face. God will not leave them…nor us.
If you feel hopeless about your child’s situation, can I encourage you to take them to the Lord in prayer and get intentional about praying for them in specific ways. Jodie Berndt has written an amazing Praying the Scriptures series to help guide you through all stages of your child’s life.
Being Joyful in Motherhood is Found in Christ
Motherhood is an absolutely beautiful journey. But it’s important to understand that joy isn’t found or lost in the good or bad circumstances of being a mom. It’s found in Christ and His sacrifice, the purpose He has for you, the grace He’s given you, and also to your children. You can be joyful in motherhood as you seek your joy from Christ.
He desires nothing more than a relationship with your children and for them to seek Him first. When they do, they will find Him. If you have a child who isn’t following the Lord, the best thing you can do for them is pray. The only One who has the power to change hearts is the Holy Spirit. Let Him do His good work while you battle for your child in prayer.
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. -Romans 12:12
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